# Baghdad Police Dept Is Hiring



## Anonymous (Jan 1, 1970)

Great new job posting just opened up. It's in Baghdad Iraq. 
Duties include, but are not limited to; suppresssing riots, looting, bank robbery, thuggery, buggery, rape, arson, multiple homicides, genocide, assaults, shootings, etc.... Finding and bringing to justics Baath party members is encouraged. You get the picture. 
Specialized duties include; finding and destroying Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD), unexploded ordnance, Warrant Apprehension Unit (Deck of cards with 55 faces will be provided).
Internal Affairs Unit has openings for purging of the internal workings of the PD of all Baath party members loyal to Saddam Hussein and his underlings.
Baghdad PD is a very diverse job which requires you to work with various multi-ethnic coalitions and tribes loyal to their own specific Mullah. Ability to speak native language is essensial but not prohibitive to getting the job. 
You will be dealing with Sunni, Shi'ite and Kurdish members of Iraq who may or may not like each other so mediation skills are necessary for performing a good job. 
Firearms training is provided and you will each be issued an AK47, AK74, a 9mm of your choice, & 20,000 rounds of ammo. All firearms come in standard or gold plated finishes, your choice. 
Pay is $40 / week (which is equal to 10 months wages back home in the US States) and there is no taxes to be paid on any wages, earnings or bribes you may encounter. You can live like a King, literally. 
There is no written test or specific academy requirements at all. Anyone with a pulse can join as long as you can pass a physical pre-screening which does include having to jump over a 5 foot wall. Sorry, but they have standards they must maintain. 
I would join but they already have told me that my heavy handed tactics did remind them of the previous regime and that my services will not be necessary. Oh well, there's always the next civil service test. Good luck to you all.


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## Foxracingmtnridr (Feb 23, 2003)

You just uplifted your status from Choade to Tool in my book







That was a good one.

Scott


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## mpd61 (Aug 7, 2002)

Actually.........

If anyone is seriously interested, DYNCORP is the contractor for International Police (U.N.) and they are looking for civilians to work in Kosovo, Iraq and other places for $100,000 per year. (once you're out of U.S. for 30 days, you don't pay taxes on it)
Talk about the ultimate community police experience!









http://policemission.dyncorp.com

DISCLAIMER: this post is not intended to upset Used2becop


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## Christopher (Oct 21, 2002)

> Originally posted by sapd324:
> * You just uplifted your status from Choade to Tool in my book
> 
> 
> ...


Choade, haha. That word isn't used enough!!


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## Foxracingmtnridr (Feb 23, 2003)

No it isn't!







and i'm at the forefront of bringing it back it's gonna be used as much as Dude when i'm done with it









I'm gonna make people sick of it








Ha ha!









Scott


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## chuckfarley (Mar 11, 2003)

If it sounds too good to be true...

Midnight shift with a beat up camel. no thanks! Kudos for the info though.


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## Anonymous (Jan 1, 1970)

Hey Chuck Farley,

You're a smart fella, or is that a fart smella'? Or are you Fuck Charlie? I can't decide.


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## EsxPD319 (Mar 16, 2003)

The only appealing part is NO TAXES!!!!!


Ed


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## chuckfarley (Mar 11, 2003)

Hey UsedtoB,
you ain't so mucking fuch yourself! :lol:


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