# Deval’s already bucking for cold shoulder



## kwflatbed (Dec 29, 2004)

By *Howie Carr*
Boston Herald Columnist
Friday, December 15, 2006

*S*o now there is proof of what we have long suspected: *Deval Patrick* and his crew of moonbats don't have sense enough to come in out of the cold. 
What a marvelous idea. Let's have the governor's inauguration outside. In the first week of January! The climate's always so accommodating around here in early January. 
So why are the legislators so concerned about the frigid weather? Anyone who voted for Deval would be glad to talk to them about global warming. And talk to them, and then talk to them some more. 
Plus, it's not like the solons couldn't handle a few hours outside in the cold. Most of them pack more blubber than your average whale. And what does outgoing Gov. *Mitt Romney* care when he makes the lone, or is it long, walk? Let him clear out of the Corner Office the night before, to the tune of Wilson Pickett's classic, "Midnight Mover."

 But the outdoor inauguration is about Deval Patrick wanting to do the JFK thing. Obama who? In this case, Deval-apalooza trumps Obamamania. Senators aren't inaugurated, but presidents are - and governors, too. This is Deval's way of saying: Put that in your Marlboros and smoke it, Big Ears!


Of course, JFK was sworn in 400 miles south of here, in Washington D.C. And it was still bitterly cold - have you ever seen the film of aged poet Robert Frost struggling to read his own words?

The biggest problem for Deval al fresco would be recreating JFK's speech. Have you reread it lately? Talk about cold, as in Cold War.

JFK didn't include a word about gay marriage! Or free tuition for illegal aliens. And the 1961 inaugural address is full of the G-word - God.Not just God, but "Almighty God," and "God's work" and "His blessing and His help." It's not very inclusive. Nothing about Ramadan, or Kwanzaa.

In other words, there's very little material that could be, ahem, re-gifted to a "Happy Holidays" kind of guy like Gov.-elect Patrick.

But from a moonbat perspective, the most shocking part of JFK's speech is the saber-rattling against Communists, who just happen to be the people most of Deval's supporters were rooting for in the Cold War.

Long twilight struggle? To Deval's supporters that was the hanging-chad battle in Florida in 2000.

But any alert speech writer, especially if he has experience at the Globe, will quickly spot liftable material from the section about the Alliance for Progress for South America.

"To our sister republics south of our border, we offer a special pledge."

So far so good. But of course Deval will have to red-pencil JFK's next lines about fighting subversion. For Deval's special pledge, he can offer "south of the border" those driver's licenses it's against the law to give them, not to mention the free Section 8 housing and the WIC and the food stamps and the SSI: "We shall pay any price, bear any burden." 

That's what all of us Americans who pay taxes are afraid of, once everyone decides to take Deval up on his offer. One thing you can say about Deval. He'd give an illegal alien the shirt off your back. 
 You know, if the inauguration is going to be held outdoors, why not just move the whole damn thing to the Quabbin reservoir, and combine it with an ice-fishing tournament. Reps. Kujawski and Dempsey could host a keg-fest for the Legislature, and everyone could get a good glow on. 
"And the glow from that fire," as JFK said, "can truly light the world." 
Or at least enough for the state police to tell tow trucks where to go to pull reps' cars out of the ditch.


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## JoninNH (Jan 29, 2004)

Fucking awesome!


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## Guest (Dec 16, 2006)

Howie Carr is the balls, unless he's talking about details or the Quinn Bill.


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## CJIS (Mar 12, 2005)

Nice


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## TacEntry1 (Nov 29, 2006)

=d>


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## Spart12 (Nov 30, 2006)

Howie Carr has nothing good to say about anybody. He gets paid to piss as many people off as possible. Wouldnt have mattered who won the election, he would find/invent ways to tear them up


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## dcs2244 (Jan 29, 2004)

Yeah, but he's dead on in this case...Deval and the people who supported him are mensheviks.


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