# need some advice guys..



## Guest (Nov 12, 2006)

I've got a quick question for everyone, does your family support you as an law enforcement officer? I have been working with a local PD for almost 2 years now. My family absolutely hates police officers and now me, this is beacuse my sister who is about 21 has been arrested a gaggle of times by several different departments for several different things including poess. cocaine, 209a domestic asault and battery, use of a mv w/o permission ect; She went through a court appointed drug rehab and now has been out for about 3 months and back on the shit. She still lives at home and if I stop by her room is filled with drug para. including pen tubes, springs, caps, diaper bags strewn through the area. So therefor my family espically my mother thinks the police are evil and corrupt because if they wernt they woulde'nt be locking up their little angel. This whole fued has gone so far as to having me cut from the will and even threats that the family will make up lies about me so I will lose my job. If they see me around town they mock me and disrespect my uniform. Everytime I try to stand up for my self and my honorable profession (verbally) they threaten to call the station and say I assaulted them all and laugh about how easily they could have my badge taken away. I really havent told any one I work with about my situation I pretty much feel absolutely stuck? Anyone have any advice? Thanks a lot


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## KozmoKramer (Apr 25, 2004)

Looks to me like their displeasure is misplaced.
Instead of hating the police for daughters irresponsible and criminal behavior, they should focus on getting your sibling some help.
They should also be proud of the mature and upright decisions you have made in your young life.


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## kttref (Oct 5, 2004)

It may be time to mention something to one of your supervisors. It doesn't look like there is too much you can do unless they take it further. So, I would think, the best course of action is inform your higher-ups and go from there. 

I'm sure it sounds a lot easier then it is though. Good luck.


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## JoninNH (Jan 29, 2004)

Definately inform your immediate supervisor. Trust me.


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## Gil (Jun 15, 1998)

That situation really sucks! 

I think you really need to inform your supervisors and if my family acted that way I would cut all ties with them, but then again I can be cold at times. Stay clear of this sister that's for sure. You don't want to be put in the position where you have to slap cuffs on her, it will just open a bigger can of worms than you already have.

I don't see any problem with telling your co-workers your situation. I had (ok still have) a sister that was a little like yours, always getting into trouble and dropping my name. At first I got the courtesy calls to pick her up etc... I finally started putting the word out that she was a "shit bird" and I wanted nothing to do with her before the area departments started locking her up. 

Sometimes you just have to move on...


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## adroitcuffs (Jun 3, 2006)

Definitely give your supervisor the heads up on the family situation. I can relate. I'd taken too much grief from the bio-mom & bio-sister before I finally cut the ties. A couple of things happened that helped me move on, including bio-mom lying to my background investigator to try to keep me out of the academy (it didn't work, by the way). I kept a lot of family issues secret to save my own embarassment but that was the last straw. I have had nothing to do with them for about 15 years now. You are not an endentured servant to your family. Don't get me wrong, I truly value family but you can't pick what you're born into. In looking at their alcoholic (amongst other things) lifestyle, I decided that personally, I didn't want to be around them and professionally, I couldn't. My life is sooooo much better without their drama! I have a wonderful "family" network with very close friends. You may do well with some soul searching on this one. Wish you the best!


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## ferus fidelitas (Aug 23, 2005)

Kozmo hit the nail on it's head - You are what you are because you choose to be - responsible, or irresponsible ...The consequences are predictable.. No person can live an irresponsible, dishonest and harmful lifestyle for long without facing the needed consequences .. Nothing and no one is more important than family - No one cares about you more - She needs tough love and a firm line in the sand - Her "friends" are anything but.. Stand firm - Someday, hopefully soon, they will see the big picture and realize that YOU were the one that was pragmatic and truly in her corner - Her current lifestyle is a recipe for disaster. Her apologists are doing her No favors... they need to think deeper than the depth of a cookie sheet IF they truly want to help her. Someday she and they, will appreciate pragmatic people like you and raise an eyebrow at the foolish, shallow apologists of self destructive behavior that basically encouraged her misguided and self disintergrating way of life.. (the difference between a democ rat and a Republican  ) She needs to smarten up - The limp wristed liberal wimps are doing her no favors - Best of luck to both of you. Sometimes people need to hit rock bottom brfore they realize they need to change - all will be ik in the end - hang in there.


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## Guest (Nov 14, 2006)

thanks guys, I really appreicate the advice


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## 209 (Jun 18, 2005)

Stand Tall!! You are part of one of the largest families in the world, the law enforcement family!Be Proud to be able to wear that uniform. Many try to become Officers few can actually do it. Stick to your guns. Family is important but you are on honorable path. 

Also, welcome to Masscops.com please register, you can do more on the site and people can get to know who you are. Thanks-


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## nightcopppa (Sep 4, 2004)

I would make the first move like the others said and inform your immediate supervisor right away. Unfortunately you can't choose your family and situations happen like this frequently. it might sound like an extremely difficult thing to do, but I would create distance between you and those family members. By doing so it may help them realize how serious you are about the job and the path you have chosen. It will certainly make it much more difficult to get caught up in some bullshit. Bottom line is if they are threatening you and disrespecting you the way they are, then they probably aren't the type of people you want to be around anyways. Sometimes in life you have to cut the cord and that's a difficult thing to do. Just do it.


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## 94c (Oct 21, 2005)

You are not alone. Many departments have quite a few officers who are considered the "black sheep" of the family. They continue to do their job and do it well.

Sooner or later, if things continue, you'll probably grow apart anyway.


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