# Three year old boy



## aran isle (Mar 17, 2009)

The Three Year Old Boy
Frank Borelli
Editor-in-Chief
Officer.com

Every now and then something happens that really sticks in my craw. Last week, several things happened like that. As the news media reported on all of the events Surrounding the arrest of Professor Gates in Cambridge, President Obama got involved, and I found a plethora of blogs online criticizing Sgt. Crowley for being prejudiced or racial, all too often with the added comment of like every other cop. Fate is fickle but sometimes quite timely. As things work out, I received an email just this morning regarding an event that occurred just yesterday (July 26th, 2009) reflecting on an experience he had.
I wanted to share this article / email for several reasons:
It shows that cops can be deeply affected by events they experience or witness in the course of their duties.
In this case in particular, the emotions inspired by the event weren't affected by or divided by racial differences.
Above all else, cops are human too! We can hurt and grieve just like everyone else.

Here is the piece as it was sent to me:
DATELINE: Boca Raton, FL
Sunday, July 26, 2003

I met a little boy I'll never forget today at about 2:45PM.

Terrance seemed a pleasant youngster of about 3 years old. He was unusually quiet and our meeting was quite by chance. While heading southbound on I-95 at Glades road, en route to see a friend from the National Law Enforcement Officers Memorial (Washington DC) who was visiting in Pampano Beach, my wife and I encountered a Chevy trailblazer. It was lying on its passenger side in the gore at the south bound exit ramp to Glades Rd. The Chevy had come to rest only seconds prior to our arrival.

I stopped our car in the freeway gutter and carefully made my way across the road as traffic began to back up.

There was an adult black male lying face down on the asphalt roadway. He was moaning, and bleeding from the spot where the back of his skull met the windshield. He was alert and conversational. Though very uncomfortable, he appeared to be in no real danger. I told him to lie very still until help arrived.
There were two adult black females, one of which was hysterically out of control which was creating havoc and unrest in the others who were part of the situation. I worked hard to calm her down. From the corner of my eye, I saw another off-duty officer tending to a small child lying on the grass. Both of the females were bleeding from multiple locations on their bodies, but there was nothing that was life threatening on either of them. I finally got the hysterical one under control.

Check list: 
Anymore injuries? No.
Has 911 been called? Many times, by many people.
How long has it been? It seemed like an hour, but it was only about 5 minutes.
Situational awareness: Traffic is now really backing up and there is some concern of a second crash amongst the gawkers.
Is everyone still breathing? Yes

The other officer said he notified the fire department of a trauma alert on the little boy. Initially, the child was not breathing. However, breathing resumed and his heart rate was strong. Oddly though, he laid there in total silence without so much as a whimper for his mom or dad.

It was then that I met Terrance.

I knelt along side him. I did not want him to move. I talked with him. I told him that his family would be okay. He looked wide-eyed at me, but said nothing. I touched his hand and tried to reassure him that all would be okay. Help was on the way - we could hear the sirens as the crew raced their way to us.
It was now time to hold everything steady until the paramedics arrived, which they did. The other officer and I briefed the arriving crew. We told the cops what they needed to know and helped to get some of the stopped drivers back on their way.

Yup, it's a bit of an adrenaline rush. But, as cops are known to do - we came on a problem and handled it to the best of our abilities. Again I was reminded that we don't have the luxury of standing on the sidelines when things go sideways. We're always in the game.
I was tired and went to bed around 10:00PM. My wife came to bed after watching the 11:00PM news. The news reporter said that Terrance died at the hospital a few hours after the crash. When she told me, I felt like I had been kicked in the groin and sucker-punched in the gut at the same time.
I have just now read the on-line report. Seemingly, the adults in this boy's life didn't care enough to have him in a seatbelt or any kind of child restraint. He was ejected from the Trailblazer as it rolled over.

This hurts. My cop exterior has been burnished with service in a metropolitan area. Adults screw-up all the time and (usually) get what they deserve. Harming a child pierces that armor like a hot knife through butter.

Terrance deserved more. Every child does.

I feel anger at his parents for being significant contributors to his death. Yet, I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child - or grandchild. The cop in me wants to fix this. I want to say something profound and make it all better. I want to take control and turn back the clock so that it doesn't happen. But alas, I cannot.
I met a 3 year old boy named Terrance today.

He was a wonderful young boy. He is back in God's hands now. May God have mercy on those responsible for this tragic turn of events.
For me: I will spend some time pondering the meaning of it all and then get back in the saddle. Please keep that family in your prayers. They need them now, more than ever.
When I read that this morning - and then spoke to the author on the phone - it was blatantly obvious how deeply grieved he was that he couldn't save that little boy's life. After all, he's only human. He can't turn back the clock. He can't change past events. He can't bring that boy back to life. As much as he'd like to do any or all of those things - he's only human.

Perhaps&#8230; just perhaps&#8230; the next time someone feels the need to criticize the police for some perceived slight, they should take a moment to consider experiences like this. Cops deal with this for the entire span of their 20, 25, 30 or more year career. How many people, so quick to criticize, can deal with it once or twice? How willing are they to have the courage and intestinal fortitude to deal with it for a significant portion of their life?

Share this story with your family and friends. Someone send it to Sgt. Crowley, Professor Gates and President Obama. Cops are heroes every day of their lives on the job. How do we manage to forget that?
The UnOfficial Border Patrol Hiring Web Site www.honorfirst.com








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## shawnl2213 (May 5, 2008)

WOW!!! You never forget the young ones who get hurt or killed. I know there are a few that I wish I was never involved in!!!


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## Kilvinsky (Jan 15, 2007)

I've been blessed not to lose a child either at home or work. I've dealt with children in bad situations but all had the hope that things would get better. 

This was a great story that really makes one think. Thanks for sharing.


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## lpwpd722 (Jun 13, 2006)

When I was an emt on the town ambulance I responded to a call for an mva w/p.i. . I along w/duty officer were first on scene. A 14 yo had been ejected and thrown all the way across the road and the 19 yo driver got thrown out the side of the vehicle that had be shaved away by the 90mph + impact with a large tree. These kids were both D.O.S. They were my neighbors, the kids my kids hung around with. I still to this day wonder if I could have done something differently. I know I couldn't. This was 9 yrs ago and it still haunts me.


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## MikeO (Jul 2, 2008)

That's a shame and no one should ever have to deal with it. Not only should a parent never have to deal with losing a child, but even though you might not know the child long they are in your life for that short time, and because you care, that hurts to find out just the same. 

We are all human and we can't always change the outcomes. You can only do so much and sometimes that just isn't enough, but that doesn't make it feel any better.


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