# 11 year old commits suicide after bullying



## lpwpd722 (Jun 13, 2006)

*Mom says Springfield boy, 11, who committed suicide was repeatedly bullied at school*

*by The Republican Newsroom Wednesday April 08, 2009, 9:06 PM*








Carl Joseph Walker-Hoove, 11, killed himself at his home on Northampton Avenue in Springfield on Monday.

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National School Safety Center

*By MIKE PLAISANCE *
*and PATRICK JOHNSON *
*Staff writers *

SPRINGFIELD - Two days after the worst day of her life, when she found her 11-year-old son had committed suicide by hanging himself, Sirdeaner L. Walker said on Wednesday she wants the bullying to stop.

She found Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover hanging by an extension cord on the second floor of their 124 Northampton Ave. home Monday night after he had endured another day of taunting at New Leadership Charter School, where he was a sixth-grader, she said.

"I just want to help some other child. I know there are other kids being picked on, and it's day in and day out," said Walker, 43.

She spoke in her living room surrounded by family and friends. They had just returned from a church service.

Photos of a beaming Carl - he played football, basketball and was a Boy Scout - peered from the top of the television.

Walker went upstairs to check on him Monday night.

"It was the worst experience of my life, and I'm a breast cancer survivor. Four years, it was four years ago I had breast cancer," Walker said.

She phoned the school repeatedly since Carl began attending in September but the bullying continued, she said.

Other students made him a target, daily calling him gay, making fun of how he dressed and threatening him, she said.

Carl had attended Alfred M. Glickman Elementary School up to fifth grade, but few of his friends accompanied him to New Leadership Charter School, she said.

On Monday, she said Carl told her that he accidentally hit a TV at the school with his backpack and the TV bumped into a girl, who shouted at him and threatened him with harm. He called his mother after school and said he had gotten a five-day suspension, she said.

School officials denied the incident had prompted a five-day suspension, said Walker, who nonetheless remains upset at what she said was the school's pattern unresponsiveness.

"I called there every week," she said.

School officials told her they had decided that the mediation of Carl's dispute with the female student was to consist of the two students eating lunch together all week, she said.

It belies the school's failure to address suffering wrought by bullying, she said.

"If anything can come of this, it's that another child doesn't have to suffer like this and there can be some justice for some other child. I don't want any other parent to go through this," she said.

Henry M. Thomas III, chairman of the school's board of directors, failed to return repeated calls seeking comment.

Walker said she was upset with Thomas for failing to return her calls, as well.

The New Leadership Charter School, 180 Ashland Ave., is offering grief counseling to students and staff in light of the death of a six-grader on Monday, according to the school's Web site. Go to spsnlcs.com and click on Login to Homework.

Donations can be made to help the boy's family by contacting the school, the Web site said.

"The NLCS family has suffered a major loss," said the Web site.

Walker works as director homeless programs at the Massachusetts Career Develop Institute here. She will turn 44 on April 23, and she said she and Carl would joke of how their birthdays were so close, as he would have turned 12 on April 17, she said.

According to the National Youth Violence Prevention Center, nearly one in three youth nationwide reported either being bullied, having bullied someone, or have done both.

According to the center, one recent study of grades 6-10, showed as many as 13 percent reported bullying others, and 11 percent said they were victims of bullies.

Victims of bullies become anxious, insecure and cautious, suffer low self-esteem and rarely defend themselves or retaliate. Often they feel isolated and withdrawn.

The most common reason cited by youth for why someone is targeted for bullying is because the person does not fit in.

The Center also notes there can be long-term effects for both the victim and perpetrator of bullying.

Victims as adults suffer from depression and poor self-esteem, while 60 percent of bullies in grades 6-9 had at least one criminal conviction by age 24.

The National School Safety Center defines bullying as physical confrontations and direct threats of violence, but also indirect forms such as rejection and exclusion, humiliation and name calling, manipulating friends, and more recently, hurtful messages sent by e-mail or posted on Web sites.

_Mike Plaisance can be reached at [email protected] and Patrick Johnson can be reached at [email protected] _


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## w3llborn (Apr 5, 2009)

This is one of the saddest stories i've heard in a while. This is exactly why people shouldn't bully other kids and try to be the "cool" kid. I hope the kids that were bullying him see and feel the tremendous pain they caused and should be severely punished somehow. People think that making fun of other kids is fun and amusing, but they don't understand that some people go home everyday and feel like crap. I used to see it when i was younger and I still see it in high school everyday. Very sad story.


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## LGriffin (Apr 2, 2009)

This really sucks. 
It would be nice if they gave those kids a real "talking to" at a school assembly, but given the location, it's doubtful.


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## w3llborn (Apr 5, 2009)

I wish they could get a lot more than just a 'talking to' but I don't know if they can actually get in trouble. Is there any police punishment for kids who tease and bully another kid the point of suicide, because if there isn't I really think they should have some.


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## StbbrnMedic (Nov 28, 2008)

That poor family. This scares me so much. I have 3 children in the elementary school system right now, 2 getting ready to enter middle school, and I'm so afraid! They are wonderful kids, all 3 of them, and make friends easily, but no matter how wonderful they are there is some kid that will pick on them or bully them. Some kids are ruthless. Mean, heartless, and ruthless. 
These are the times I understand why some parents homeschool.


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## lpwpd722 (Jun 13, 2006)

When I read this my heart ached so much. I am proud of my kids, all popular. They always befriended the "uncool" kids. I don't know how the kids who teased and bullied this kid will turn out in life or even if they are conscious of the fact that they caused this. I hope the bullies out there learned some type of lesson. God blessed him and his family.


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## NewEngland2007 (Dec 31, 2005)

The bullies won't realize what kind of damage they did until they are much older. I think it's important to impress upon your own kids not to engage in that type of behavior but more so to make sure they understand that if they ever get picked on, don't take it to heart because bullies are usually the kids living in majorly effed up situations.


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## Guest (Apr 9, 2009)

NewEngland2007 said:


> I think it's important to impress upon your own kids not to engage in that type of behavior but more so to make sure they understand that if they ever get picked on, don't take it to heart because bullies are usually the kids living in majorly effed up situations.


I just tell my son to punch them in the face.....much quicker return on the effort, and a lasting solution, because bullies don't try to pick on someone who's going to fight them.


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## jettsixx (Dec 10, 2005)

I agree with Delta tell punch the little bastard in the face. Even if they "lose" the fight they win. Bullies wont keep picking on the kid that is going to stand up for themselves. I agree it is a sad, But I also think bullies have always been a part of school and always will be. If you dont learn how to stand up for yourself in school I feel you will not be able to stand up for yourself in life. I personally dont think the bullies should be charged with anything. If they were then what would stop every parent of a victim of suicidefrom claiming it was because of a bully?


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## HuskyH-2 (Nov 16, 2008)

Poor mother, What a cute kid. 

Maybe im ignorant of this, but do kids especially at that age, who take their life usually hang themselves? Maybe he got it from TV or something but that just seems like such a for lack of a better term "grown up" way to do it, it just kinda disturbs me even more.


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## Hawk19 (Jan 9, 2009)

Wow. Never heard of a suicide this young before, tragic.


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## HuskyH-2 (Nov 16, 2008)

jettsixx said:


> I agree with Delta tell punch the little bastard in the face. Even if they "lose" the fight they win. Bullies wont keep picking on the kid that is going to stand up for themselves. I agree it is a sad, But I also think bullies have always been a part of school and always will be. If you dont learn how to stand up for yourself in school I feel you will not be able to stand up for yourself in life. I personally dont think the bullies should be charged with anything. If they were then what would stop every parent of a victim of suicidefrom claiming it was because of a bully?


I agree bullies always will and always have existed. Some kids don't have the skills to really overcome it. I know the kids who I knew that got bullied still had friends, a lot of times other kids who got picked on, but at least they weren't alone. I think when the kids gets completely alienated is when stuff like this happens. This is why I'm all for putting kids in youth sports and cubs scouts when their young even if they stink or don't like it. You meet a lot of kids and can make friends outside of just your school even if your the worst athlete. Just my opinion.


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## Guest (Apr 9, 2009)

jettsixx said:


> I agree with Delta tell punch the little bastard in the face. Even if they "lose" the fight they win. Bullies wont keep picking on the kid that is going to stand up for themselves.


Exactly....they just move on to easier targets.


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## HistoryHound (Aug 30, 2008)

My heart goes out to this young man's family. How sad it is that he didn't know that it's the bullies in this world that are the truly pathetic. I've always told my kids that they don't have to like everyone that they meet, but they do have to treat others the way that they want to be treated. They were also taught that bullies are only trying to make people feel as worthless as they feel. They were taught that it is perfectly acceptable to stand up for themselves and others as long as they weren't cruel in doing so. Maybe if the school had responded to this mother's concerns, we wouldn't be having this discussion. Maybe if the school had done it's job and helped teach these kids, this young man would have known that on his worst day he was a far better person than the bullies will be on their best days.


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## rg1283 (Sep 14, 2005)

Delta784 said:


> I just tell my son to punch them in the face.....much quicker return on the effort, and a lasting solution, because bullies don't try to pick on someone who's going to fight them.


I did that once and it worked. I quickly learned in 7th grade that ALL of the kids that bother you have issues of their own and are most likely going to jail.

A revolution then occurred a close friend of mine said to one of the kids that was bothering me that he was going to go to jail when he (if) stressing the part of graduating.

Well now everyone is doing okay and most of the people that bothered me are either dope heads or in jail.


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## NewEngland2007 (Dec 31, 2005)

I've been thinking about this story all day. I wish that child had a support system that would have helped him get through it. I wish he'd stuck it out because something tells me years from now, he'd have an advanced degree and great job and life and those losers who harrassed him would be on skid row.


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## Hawk19 (Jan 9, 2009)

mtc said:


> Two years ago one of the boys from my son's school hung himself. It was awful and he didn't even know him, he was a younger boy, I want to say 11 or 12. These kids went to that school because they were academically advanced in some subject.... that kid was going to have the world by the balls.


I remember watching a documentary about suicides on the SF bridge a while back; a few actually survive the fall. One guy, who did, said that the second he stepped off the bridge he realized all his problems could be solved.


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## justanotherparatrooper (Aug 27, 2006)

I look at this as two seperate issues.
Bullying can only be stopped by fighting back and standing up for yourself. Just as my parents did I told my kids early on to fight back if attacked.I told em I would back them a 100 % and did on three occasions with the school. I also told em that Id better never find out THEY bullied.
Suicide, though Ive never attempted it Id be lying if I said I had never thought of it. I just remember it as being TOTALLY overwhelmed in every sence of the word. I felt as though EVERYTHING had gone wrong, like a perfect storm.financially and personally.Thank God I didnt drink or abuse drugs because that mightve pushed me over the edge. I had just gone through a bitter and nasty three year divorce. My one "shinning star" Rachel had been murdered hours before and I just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up, I had no ambition to do anything. It was my family and friends (some of you on here later on) that carried me through those times. Im really not sure what we as a society can do about this....Weve become so detached from each other.Id venture to guess not more then a handful of people on here knows all their neighbors. Its so easy once youre feeling isolated to figure no one will miss you or care that youre gone so why not just "end it". Sorry for the rambling guys, guess Im just trying to say the one thing I know helps to prevent suicide is genuine friendship and family but its not a guarentee....everyone has their demons and sometimes the demons win out


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## BrickCop (Dec 23, 2004)

Delta784 said:


> I just tell my son to punch them in the face.....much quicker return on the effort, and a lasting solution, because bullies don't try to pick on someone who's going to fight them.


I told my son to always keep his hands to himself but all bets are off when someone tries to play piniata with him.

A few years ago my son was quasi friends with an older kid who lived up the street. There was a slight difference in size but that didn't stop the kid from routinely showboat slamming my son too hard in the neighborhood football games.

I happened to come home to witness one such incident as my kid looked at me like a deer in the headlights. I calmly said "are you going to defend yourself"? My son looked at me for about a second before he went apeshit on the kid...we're talking Ralphie vs. Scut Farcus. The neighborhood kid not only figured out that my son wasn't going to put up with his crap, he also discovered my son had a green light from the old man to defend himself. Not only did the bullying stop but they're actually prety good friends today.

Sometimes the worse beating you can take from bullies is the one you don't take.


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## Guest (Apr 11, 2009)

BrickCop said:


> I told my son to always keep his hands to himself but all bets are off when someone tries to play piniata with him.


Absolutely; I've made it clear to my son he should not initiate contact, but once contact is made, all bets are off. It took some deprogramming to convince him that he doesn't need to worry about what the teachers and principal will do if he defends himself, but he now gets it.

<the lesson on laying-out his opponent while he's in the middle of talking shit and/or taking off his jacket/shirt will come much later >

It also doesn't hurt that he's a full head-plus taller than anyone else in first grade.


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## merwin10 (Apr 7, 2009)

My heart goes out to this young man and his family! What caused the issue to get this bad unfortunately is the system! Years ago when Dad was still alive he told me never to pick on anyone or if he found out about it I wish I was dead! However, if I was picked on I had his permission to wale away and he would back me up! He did so on several occasions! Of course things were different in the late 60's. Now, right, wrong or indifferent you fight your expelled, you all know the politically correct term "Zero Tolerance!". Well in this case "Zero Tolerance!" is a way of saying take your lumps and hold it in, it is your problem! Obviously the school officials had better things to do if this took place at school! I hold them responsible as they were not paying attention. I have worked allot with youth in the past 40 years and I can tell right away when a kid is bothered by something! Getting them to open up and let it out is the problem! For the most part you need to EARN their trust! That takes time and you need to LISTEN well! Today who of us has the time and how many listen to what is being said! The system we have developed over the years in the name of protecting our kids, has back fired! Youth today are very afraid of adults because the system today tells them stay away from strangers! This has progress to the point of distrust! Maybe rightfully so, but what we have created is round box with no corners and the youth of today is trying to find a corner to hide in! Thus there is only one way out! Tragic as it may seem we have let this happen over time!

I am sure that this young man did not deserve want happened and my prays go out to his family and friends.

Mike -


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## 7costanza (Aug 29, 2006)

Do schools have ways to deal with this stuff, maybe a safe to say program where students can report bullying without having to get that snitch label. An 11 yr old should not know how to or even what suicide is.


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## justanotherparatrooper (Aug 27, 2006)

7costanza said:


> Do schools have ways to deal with this stuff, maybe a safe to say program where students can report bullying without having to get that snitch label. An 11 yr old should not know how to or even what suicide is.


Thats the problem in my opinion, they DO DEAL with it.THey teach that violence is ALWAYS wrong and that the answer is always to report it. Exactly the wrong answer....and the reason we have so many pussies in this great country of ours( big brother will take care of it for you).


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## Guest (Apr 11, 2009)

I'll pray that Carl Walker is welcomed by the Father and all his angels in Heaven. He deserves it. It sounds like the bullying he dealt with was at an extreme level.
As for everyday, shall I say, routine bullying, it has always been around. The problem nowadays seems to be that many kids cannot deal with it. I think our society is training children to be pussies. No scores during games, so no ones feelings are hurt. No tag, because it is to rough. Teachers can't raise their voice at a student. Some schools got rid of the Honor Society, to spare the feelings of others. Every student gets a gold star. No awards for art/science fairs. The list goes on and on.

My son is only 15 months old, but as some guys have already said, he'll be exposed to the Scouts, sports, etc. If he grows up to be scared of his own shadow, then Oh well, I tried. 
I was in the Cub & Boy Scouts. I played a couple of sports, elementary school through college, and was a master of none. I was bullied and also did some bullying. It added flavor to life. I went on to join the Army, bullied some foreigners and now I wear the Commonwealth's uniform. I survived and it was due to the successes & failures my parents & teachers exposed me to. 
There is a great disservice being done to todays children. Hopefully, parents will wake up to this fact. Many of us (LEOs) see the result of the pussification, esp, of men, during the course of our shifts. I am disgusted when I approach a guy who is about to have an anxiety attack over something as simple as a flat tire. Or the wining man who calls 911 because another operator cut him off and gave him the finger. Wah, wah, wah, my pussy hurts. 
Look at the bullying that occurs on this site. Most of us deal with it.


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## BrickCop (Dec 23, 2004)

Well said MSP. You have to let your kids experience adversity so they will know how to deal with it.


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