# The year is 2029-----



## Mortal knight (Jun 17, 2003)

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language. 

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock. 

Baby conceived naturally . . . scientists stumped. 

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage. 

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon). 

Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels. 

France pleads for global help after being overtaken by Jamaica. 

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking. 

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036. 

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only. 

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss. 

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs. 

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut. 

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative. 

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. 

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches. 

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036. 

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts. 

Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman. 

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent. 

Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting machine.


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## JoninNH (Jan 29, 2004)

> Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.


 :L: That'll never happen.


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## stm4710 (Jul 6, 2004)

> Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.


Following the precident set by the Massachusetts supreme court. :roll:


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## kttref (Oct 5, 2004)

JoninNH";p="50324 said:


> > Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
> 
> 
> :L: That'll never happen.


Want to know how you can see a women with her mouth closed???

Offer to help cook, clean and do the laundry! [-o<


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## stm4710 (Jul 6, 2004)

I cook all time........I am a good italian cook. Italian is the food of love.......and I have a good results when I cook for a date. :twisted:


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## kttref (Oct 5, 2004)

....and does she keep her mouth shut?


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## mpd61 (Aug 7, 2002)

kttref";p="50338 said:


> JoninNH";p="50324 said:
> 
> 
> > > Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
> ...


Actually.............

Wouldn't her jaw drop OPEN?
:lol:


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## mpd61 (Aug 7, 2002)

Actually I'm hoping by 2029 they'll have cured Cancer and Halitosis.


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## Channy1984 (Jul 24, 2004)

You forgot that in 2029, all Police departments in MA will be required to carry Slingshots for a sidearm. This is due to liberal arguments that firearms are too inhumane and excessive to use on a violent person trying to run you over with their car.


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## Officer Dunngeon (Aug 16, 2002)

kttref";p="50338 said:


> Want to know how you can see a women with her mouth closed???
> 
> Offer to help cook, clean and do the laundry! [-o<


Or just simply say, "Yes, dear, you're right." :lol:


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## Foxracingmtnridr (Feb 23, 2003)

Mortal knight";p="50316 said:


> Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.


Ah ha ha ha It worked on the japs :evil:

Scott


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## stm4710 (Jul 6, 2004)

kttref";p="50359 said:


> ....and does she keep her mouth shut?


 Why would she? I enjoy a good conversation with a date.
:innocent:


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## kttref (Oct 5, 2004)

mpd61";p="50360 said:


> kttref";p="50338 said:
> 
> 
> > JoninNH";p="50324 said:
> ...


That's naughty!



stm4710";p="50402 said:


> kttref";p="50359 said:
> 
> 
> > ....and does she keep her mouth shut?
> ...


There are the good men out there that enjoy a good convo. Which is very nice, I was just refering to the reference in the first post in the thread.


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## KozmoKramer (Apr 25, 2004)

Mortal knight";p="50316 said:


> *Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.......*


*We Could Only Hope......
Good Post Mortal!!*  =D>


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## Southside (Sep 4, 2003)

Channy1984";p="50378 said:


> You forgot that in 2029, all Police departments in MA will be required to carry Slingshots for a sidearm. This is due to liberal arguments that firearms are too inhumane and excessive to use on a violent person trying to run you over with their car.


And to qualify and be certfied, each officer must be shot at point blank range to the forehead so that they can show it hurts but does not kill.


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